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Comments for 'Longsword: Desperation-Part Two'



Steele
12:59 am | June 12, 2003
I don't think bungie accepts fan fiction.

Do they?

Anyone know?
Sterfrye36
12:29 am | June 10, 2003
Yes, it is pronounced that way.
...And thanks. FOr keeping it clean I mean.
So...My original intention was to send this into Bungie. Does anyone still think I should? I mean, I'm still not finished yet. More stuff to come.
Steele
9:12 pm | June 9, 2003
Hardy Har Har! Haven't heard that cadence before. Most of the ones I know are short, but I won't post any because Sterfrye(is it pronounced Stir-Fry?) wants to keep it clean.
Wiley K.
6:30 pm | June 9, 2003
ROTFLMAO. Steele. That's. Pretty. Funny.


Funny cadence:

A little bird,
with a little bill.
was sitting on,
my windowsill.
I coaxed it in,
with a piece of bread.
and then I smashed,
his birdy head.
The morale is:
If you want some head,
Then get some bread!

what you got?
Sterfrye36
3:20 pm | June 9, 2003
Can we please keep it clean?
Steele
2:15 am | June 9, 2003
An alternative to SNAFU is FUBAR

Fucked Up Beyond All Repair!

Anybody need a military cadence?
Steele
2:13 am | June 9, 2003
I. Want. To. Hurt. Myself.
Steele
2:11 am | June 9, 2003
*see*
Steele
1:51 am | June 9, 2003
SNAFU: Situation Normal: All Fucked Up!

Yeah, I just downloaded the trailer, but I think the Elites are above the Brutes, I mean they've been a part of it longer.

Official Bungie Ship Names (that I know of): The CCS Truth and Reconcilliation, Purity of Spirit, and Tranquil Thoughts. Those are all that I know of as being official names from Bungie and they all seem to be meditating names.

When I said the Covenant act a little off, I meant in speech and mannerisms. Study the Covenant in the Flood, you'll se what I mean.
Sterfrye36
10:08 pm | June 8, 2003
To Wiley: Snafu stands for
Super
Natural
Allbecoming
F******
Ulcers

I don't really know what it stands for. It means mistakes.
Sterfrye36
10:06 pm | June 8, 2003
OH! Ok, now I get it. I thought you meant the Covvie(jk) only had one version of a fighter or something...
Sterfrye36
10:05 pm | June 8, 2003
What.Do.You.Mean.Covie.Has.One."V"?
Now, let's stop before we hurt ourselves.
'Nosolee
9:57 pm | June 8, 2003
Great story, Sterfrye36. I liked the idea of with the alliance between the two ships and it was written really well! I do, however, have to agree with some of the things steele said like the tactics and the willingness to rebell/accept the rebellion. But, ignoring that, I give it a 9.5/10
Agent Shade
9:50 pm | June 8, 2003
hey man, i dont really give a shit about all these details, i think your story was great. i didn't see any grammar mistakes and if there are, they are fixable. I've been accused of having to short of sentences, so seeing these long sentences didn't bug me. you got a great story coming along here 10/10
scope
8:54 pm | June 8, 2003
I.Dont.Know.
Wiley Kimball
8:54 pm | June 8, 2003
To Steele: what is a SNAFU?

To. Sterfrye36: Covie. Only. Has. One. "V".

Nine. Point. Five. Out. Of. Ten.
Sterfrye36
8:36 pm | June 8, 2003
Sorry. How.Can.I.Make.Them.Shorter.For.You?
scope
8:33 pm | June 8, 2003
8.5/10 Too.Many.Long.Sentences in this place.
Sterfrye36
7:55 pm | June 8, 2003
Gee, THANKS...
1: I think Elites and Brutes are supposed to be on the same level. I admit, in Halo, the Elites flew the Banshee and drove the Ghosts and whatnought. However,if you look at the Halo 2 E3 trailer screenshot of MC jumping onto the Ghost, there's a Brute in the pilot seat. That said to me that Brutes had taken over the vehicles.
2: Meaning?
3: The way I wrote it, I meant to make it seem like he had been haunted by this thing for a long while. Also, the Brutes were supposed to have just gotten into the war.
Gruth was also the most secular. That means that he was the most skeeptical of the Covenant about their religion. With that sort of distance, he realized the Prophets were just making power grabs.
There's also a thing called "Stockholm Syndrome", or something like that. That's where POWs begin to sympathize with their captors. Something similar wouild have happened to the Elite crew. I mean, you get to be around somebody who might say Hitler and Saddam were incredible people, after a long enough time, you might begin to believe them.
#4 That's really sort of up to debate.
#5 An intact Covenant Carrier would be far worth the risk. Getting your hands on that Plasma tech...If you're so dang skeptical, take a look at revenge of a Spartan. On that one, there's an underground GLO. Grunt Liberation Army.
#6 We don't really know that. For all we know, one of the ships at Reach could have been named "Sc*** Humans"
#7 My bad.
Sterfrye36
7:53 pm | June 8, 2003
How's everybody like chapter four? This one's a plot builder. The next chapter will be action packed!
Steele
7:46 pm | June 8, 2003
1. Aren't Elites the superior race, excluding Prophets?

2. Have you read Halo: The Fall of Reach or Halo: the Flood? If you have read the Flood, you'd realize that the way the Covenant act is kinda off.

3. One Covenant being may defect, but a whole shipful? Plus a Covie would need more relfection and thought too decide on defecting.

4. The humans had the superior tactics in space and on the ground. The Covenant just had better technology and more personnel.

5. Would a human captian be willing to let the Covenant defect? If I were the captian as soon as the Ship dropped its shields I would have sent it a present--in the form of a MAC round. But then you would have to consider the possibilty of capturing intact Covenant technology.

6. I'm pretty sure that all Covenant ship names have something to do with meditating or peaceful thinking.

7. Grammar mistakes.

Even with that whole slew of SNAFUs (at least in my opinion) I still find it in me to give this story an 8/10!


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