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Comments for 'Neverland: Eradication' |
Jon M
3:36 am | March 3, 2004
Crap. I just realized I read this over the weekend, but never posted. Sorry Odin. (Or maybe you are glad...if so, then sorry for posting?)
Anyway, I liked this story a lot.
Maybe a little more character based descriptions of what's going on. For example, The following sentence, "Rockets completely decimated the building." That's what Dan Rather would say in a news cast. Or in other words, it's the narrator inserting his opinion. Remember, it's what the characters see, feel hear and smell.
PS...If you guys don't want these editorial type comments, just tell me to shut the shiz up.
Again, good story.
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CoLd BlooDed
3:51 pm | February 27, 2004
They are a mix of Hunters and Brutes, for instance, a Knight has the power (or more) of a Hunter but has the agility and speed of a Brute.
They sound like one kickass Covie.
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Mind_Affecting_Parasite
2:15 pm | February 27, 2004
I'm finding this series a bit odd myself. So it'll take me a little bit to comprehend it all. But overall I think it was pretty nice. But...what are Knights?
-MAP
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Walker
10:14 pm | February 26, 2004
Okay.
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SOS.Odin
8:53 pm | February 26, 2004
thanks for the comments and its good to know someone remembers the first chapt :D
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MC's Cousin
12:13 pm | February 26, 2004
Too tired, can't comment. No but really. It was pretty good. No major flaws in there that I noticed. Of course I am rather out of it right now. Anyway...
Signing Off
MCC
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Mainevent
3:40 am | February 26, 2004
They found boxes of clothing in the first chapter.
I liked it a lot. I really wannt fight a Knight now...darn they sound fun.
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Walker
2:10 am | February 26, 2004
Nice. Hey... if the Spartans don't have their armor, wouldn't anybody else have lost their clothing in the transition? Shouldn't they all be naked?
Just a thought.
-Walker
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Helljumper
5:03 pm | February 25, 2004
good description, give em hell marines
ODST
First to Rise, Last to fall Helljumpers do it all
Feet first into Hell
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CoLd BlooDed
3:49 pm | February 25, 2004
Nice man, I've been waiting for this one. I only spotted a few spelling mistakes, but everything else was great. Keep it up Odin.
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