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Comments for 'Discovery of an Enemy, Chapter Seven: Part III'



CoLd BlooDed
1:44 am | July 16, 2004
Shit, they lost that cool chrome ball.

Yeah, more Marines needed to die, it doesn't really matter that they're expertly trained, but some needed to die. The Elite grabbing that guys leg was cool.

Again, the dialogue was great, I can't wait to read the last (few?) part(s).
Ajax
2:29 am | July 8, 2004
I don't think it would count. You can have different stories that are linked together, but they're still separate stories.

Sweet series, great story. A little unbelievable that only one Marine has died so far, but thats nitpicking. If you kill more, don't kill McCollum. He's cool.
russ687
6:03 am | July 5, 2004
Thanks for all your "positive reinforcement" as Hellljumper likes to say (or something like it).

Oh yeah, Wado's series is freaking long; it's not even worth trying to compete with that. Although does it count when there is one storyline transitioning over multiple stories? (like the Halo books, they all follow the same storyline but there are three of them).
That_Guy
7:41 pm | July 4, 2004
I like the story, u could be a pro writer. Its just my opinion. But hey, what can u do...
Jessica
12:41 am | July 4, 2004
Jeez, Wrong again...Baaaad Day...

Jess
CoLd BlooDed
12:23 am | July 4, 2004
Mainevent's Homeworlds might be the longest series, or Wado's Shadows of Archon.
Jessica
7:24 am | July 3, 2004
Oops...Nvm...'Nosolee's The Fall of Fate isn't the longest Series...-.-", Baaad Memory...sheesh...But, i do think that he holds the record for the longest Single Story, as in his Re-Edited Version, he combines a few chapter in ever "Section" of the story he re-edits...I think...Blah...

Jess
Jessica
7:21 am | July 3, 2004
You mean the longest Single Story? Or the longest Series...because if i remember correctly, The Fall of Fate by 'Nosolee is the longest Series...as he created the original series, then he went back and re-edited all of it, and re-submited it...If you're asking about the longest Single Story, then i have no clue...It also might belong to 'Nosolee...LoL

Jess
Hunter_Killer
1:53 am | July 3, 2004
Not a bad story......Not bad....
Spacefan
11:40 am | July 2, 2004
I've been reading your story for sometime but I haven't commented on it until now. As far as some of the stories I've seen on this website, yours is one of the better ones. So, keep those updates coming!
CovieKilla
6:16 am | July 2, 2004
This wasnt all that bad....russ and Helljumper, you should join my Fan Fiction forum, your presence would be appreciated. We have alotta writers there and would love for you guys to join up too. If you're interested go to:

www.rkz.opious.net/forums

You can post stories there in advance for editing and commenting to make it perfect for HBO.

Anyway, pretty good story, I hope to see some more in the future.

Good luck.

-CovieKilla
russ687
1:32 am | July 2, 2004
This is not the end folks. Although do tell me if this seems long enough :) I don't write short stories, so please don't expect anything like that from me.

By the way, what is the longest story on HBO?
Severian
8:58 pm | July 1, 2004
I thought it was good, but why couldn't you just have submitted part I and II together?
Helljumper
8:06 pm | July 1, 2004
Damn they lost the ghost ball. i dont' know if this is the end of the series, but Marines needed to die. Only way to make it believable. I dont' think an Elite would grab a dude's leg when he could just shot him but it added suspense.

ODST


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