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Comments for 'English Coursework' |
Ross Mills
3:29 pm | October 3, 2002
1. Yes, this IS an Elite's point of view of the Pillar of Autumn, Ive even changed it from this one because the original wasn't good enough.2. Unfortunately I was not allowed to enter this in the end as a text transformation in English because the "original text was not challenging enough"3. A zero G fire in a vacuum...hmmm, I forgot to mention that there were pipes, I must have thought it would be taken for granted due to it being through 5 decks. A zero G fire spreads like a bubble, EXTREMELY dangerous as you cannot duck under it, it comes towards you wherever you are unless it is pushed by the force of the pipe's oxygen/Hydrogen or something else.
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dr_saius
11:18 am | September 12, 2002
very nice story, you're a pretty good writer, I hope you write something else cause i'd be interested to read it.
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el_halo_diablo
1:35 am | September 12, 2002
The only problem I saw in it was that the Perspective changed from first to third then back to fist and then over to third and then....
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ThreadedAce3
1:10 am | September 12, 2002
I like how you did this from an elite's point of view. I would like to see more stories like this. If i were you, I would keep writing.
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gruntkiller
10:21 pm | September 11, 2002
very interesting, and very well done
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Gman
6:36 pm | September 11, 2002
i could be wrong but is this a scene from the Fall of Reach only from an elite's p.o.v.? More specifically the scene in the space dock above REACH that had the ONI stealth ship Circumference. This is where the MC meets the covenant elite for the first time. This fight goes almost punch for punch as the fight scene in the book. Just curious, but its some nice work.
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Wado
4:51 pm | September 11, 2002
Very nice. From the title I take it that this was a graded assignment, what grade did you get if you don't mind telling? If you want someone to review this for you, I'm sure somebody will step up, for me I've got two edits: (1) infrared is one word not infra red. (2) You mentioned seeing a zero-G fire, what is that? I thought just a fire in zero G but later you said they were in a vacuum so now I'm thinking it was an electrical fire or a fire burning from some pipe filled with a gas that burns like oxygen, hydrogen, argon, etc.
That's it, nice job.
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