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Comments for 'Flood of Blood' |
MasterCD
3:04 am | January 26, 2004
Cool story. I really liked the way the Marines and Sergeant spoke, it was reallistic. I agree with Awacar, big blocks of text put me off. It's hard to read. Otherwise, cool story.
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Neil Meyers (The Aurthor is you weren't paying attention before)
3:27 am | January 24, 2004
Thanks for the feedback guys, I appreciate it. As for the lack of indents i didn't realize there was even a code to begin with, plus I just copy and pasted it from my word processor.
As too Awacar's numero uno point there I started writing this just for my own amusement and for a few of my friends and one of my friend's said I should post it on the internet so I did. If I put any more stories out they'll (hopefully) be a bit more reader-friendly. Plus in short stories long descriptions and longer histories can really make a short story quite long.
Anyways, thank again for the feedback. Peace out.
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MadJackal
10:39 pm | January 23, 2004
Yeah, good story. I had trouble with that too. My first story had nothing in the way of indents or spaces between paragraphs as I did not understand or know about the code. But, by my third, I had firgured out the code and now use it to make my stories more presentable. Keep up your writing and you will improve; all of us did. Good job.
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Helljumper
6:06 am | January 23, 2004
It was ok, yea the code would be nice.
ODST
First to rise, last to fall Helljumpers do it all
Feet first into hell
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Mainevent
3:27 am | January 23, 2004
I won't read it unless it uses the code, or at least attempts to space it in someway.
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Awacar
7:57 pm | January 22, 2004
This fanfic was good at the story part, and it really caught me. There are, however, a few things that can be polished off the story.
1. Lack of description: Wasn't a huge thing, but felt annoying in some way. I guess that you use way to much info in the sentences, making them long, and don't giving them the level of detail they deserve.
2: Big blocks of text: To be honest, if the fics story hadn't been that good, I'd have wrote: Use the return button sometimes, instead of this very long coment. This is a problem, both for you and your readers. People look at the paragraphs before starting to read, and without spaces to rest their eyes on, some won't make the effort of reading a story. My eyes were terrified at the end of this story, promise.
3: Lack of code: Every time there's a new writer there's a story without proper use of pseduocode. Look at the "Directions for use" link above the story form, and you'll find the code. For exaple, when you start a new paragraph, it won't work to just press the space bar 3-4 times, they'll be erased, and at the beginning of the line there will be text. This little problem vanishes if you use the [indent] code where you want to have your paragraph indent. (I've learned that after many posted stories, and believe me, the first I wrote weren't funny to read.)
Elseway, this story was great, and you'll take care of the problems and get a great writer, I know that.
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